Tumblelog by Soup.io
Newer posts are loading.
You are at the newest post.
Click here to check if anything new just came in.

October 08 2017









you are the light at the end of a tunnel of misery

you are the shimmering pot of gold at the end of every rainbow

you are the blessed calm after a tempest

You are the reassuring smile after an eternity of sorrow

you are the rain after decades of drought

you are the soft touch after years of isolation

You are the nutrition in a balanced breakfast





I’ve said these two things before but holy shit. I need to point them out to y'all again I guess:

1: my ass is great. fuck you

2: horses are the mammalian equivalent of wasps. you see a horse, you fucking book it. I know what you’re thinking “ohhh oh but bears ohhh” and shut the fuck up. horses are in NO way endearing, and bears, (which you guys think are apparently more likened to wasps) have a popular and universally small fake version of themselves that people hug, a lot. Horses on the other hand. Are fucking bullshit muscle creatures, with veins the size of fucking firehoses. It’s bullshit. You know how when you see a wasps nest you fucking leave that shit alone? When you see a fucking open plain where horses are “”“majestically”“” grazing, its he same fucking thing. I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a horse queen in there somewhere. The only thing that could make horses scarier is if their bones weren’t made of paper or whatever.

has anyone on this website seen a horse in real life

yes why do you think they’re terrified

6540 0be0 500


Protein, baby!!!

bfgfs.com | tumblr | twitter | tapastic

Reposted bydivicavebear
6544 6d91 500


Nailed it

Reposted bydivihashcavebear
6552 bb0d 500



In Super Mario World, Banzai Bills will not harm Mario as long as he is riding Yoshi and his head is below the vertical center of the Banzai Bill. (Footage recorded by me from a SNES emulator.)

me facing my problems head on and discovering they weren’t as bad or terrifying as i thought they were because i had the love and support of a friend



  • Walk in on parents having a heated debate.
  • Am worried for a bit. Are they fighting?
  • Realize parents are having a heated debate on whether or not goats can climb trees.
  • Immediately side with mom, because I know goats can fuckin climb fucking ANYTHING because I remember the “crave that mineral” meme with the goat on the vertical cliff face apparently levitating to achieve the mineral it craves.
  • who fuckin says the internet never taught me anything
  • Dad has to leave to go back to work. Leaves convinced that no, goats can’t climb trees, they’re goats, they stay on the ground.
  • Once he’s gone, youtube search “Moroccan Tree Goats.” Find self-explanatory video of several goat up in a fuckin tree like some Dr. Seuss shit.
  • Mom looks at me like it’s the proudest she’s ever been of me in her life, including my university graduation
  • She emails it to him. At work. My dad will get a video of Moroccan goats screaming in a tree at his place of business, with the subject line “I TOLD YOU SO.”
  • Mom triumphantly yells to the empty house, “THIS IS WHY PEOPLE IN THE BIBLE THOUGHT GOATS WERE THE DEVIL.”
  • Another ordinary day in my house.

‘This is why people in the Bible thought goats were the devil’ is a really solid explanation when you see how goats defy the laws of physics.


Before you laugh and make fun of someones accent or mistakes when they speak english please take a moment to realize that you can actually learn alot about their language by their mistakes for example
When I was I denmark I noticed alot of danes say “ I will learn you ” instead of saying I will teach you because teach and learn is the same thing in danish
Also arabs when they speak english they often say “ beeebol ” instead of “ people ” or “ bebzi ” instead of “ Pepsi ” because the letter P doesn’t exist in the arabic alphabet
Theres always something to learn when you stop being an ignorant piece of shit

6554 bf0e

to the new hiveswap fans who have not read homestuck. seal your fucking grey paint for the love of fucking god





hot tips for hs cosplay:

  • arm socks are Always worth it. if you cant make them yourself, buy them online. there is no amount of powder or final seal (in my experience with ben nye and kryolan) that will keep paint on your hands and arms
  • know the different types of paint available to you. ben nye is relatively cheap and easy to use, and is waterproof if you seal it right, but is Hell to remove. also imo it feels disgusting on your skin. kryolan is water-based and a lot lighter in feel than ben nye, which i like. ime it’s a Lot messier and more smudgy than ben nye though (esp if you sweat a lot) so i dont recommend it if you’re cosplaying, say, gamzee or kurloz and want crisp lines (these are just my experiences though; i don’t cosplay regularly so i recommend doing your own research)
  • test ahead of time and if possible make sure your arm socks match your paint. its not a huge deal if they dont but it does look better, i promise
  • i suggest practicing eating w/ lipstick on if you’re not used to it, just because it’s a pain to have to reapply if you want to eat at a con

HERE YOU GO KIDDOS THIS IS AN ASK I ANSWERED A WHILE AGO !!!!! EDUCATE URSELVES. ive been doing this for years and i had to learn shit the hard way!!! listen to this advice so you dont have to struggle like most homestuck cosplayers did back in the day!

the fact were back to yelling cosplay tips at people says so much. WHY ARNT WE A DEAD FANDOM YET END THIS

because!!! if u arent aware literally homestuck cosplayers not sealing their paint at conventions has actually caused vandalism problems it was a HUGE issue and lots of conventiones had to fuckin.. change convention rules to adapt to a bunch of grey 12 year olds running around and ruining the venue. hiveswap is going to invite new ppl into the fandom and this needs to be said

6556 acc8 500



Started growing a Buzz-stache for November!  #MustBeTheHoney

6559 d8b4 500
6561 40b5 500








ramblings on discord because im just disgusted with the jacksepticeye shit going down w/ hiveswap


Homestuck fandom was the RESURGENCE of the concept of cringe fandom.

We’re the fandom with the loud, public xeno kinks that are baseline vanilla among porn circles.

We’re the fandom nearly thrown out of hotels and banned from conventions because a bulk of our cosplayers didn’t know how to seal paint.

We’re the fandom that took any vague, shiny new thing about and added -STUCK to it to make a new AU.

We are the cringe fandom.

It is us.

And if anyone from “the old guard” - CRINGE - gets uppity and in your face? You point them to me, my children, for I’ve been here longer than them, and I keep receipts.

You’re not too cringe for Homestuck. They’re not Homestuck enough for the cringe anymore. (But we’ll remind them, don’t worry.)

Friends, let me tell you about Homestuck :D

Part of the fun of being in the homestuck fandom was liking what you liked loudly and laughing at people who got mad about it, it was cringe before and its gonna be cringe again and i intend to have fun with it.

I am honestly floored that any pre-Hivevswap Homestuck fan thinks the Homestuck fandom will BECOME cringey. Like? Pre-Hiveswap prided themselves in being trash? the fuck is this fuckery?

Yeah, shit this was basically the official call-and-response on tumblr and at conventions:

Non-Homestuck: UGH, Homestuck is such fucking trash, and it’s everywhere.

The Entire Fucking Homestuck Fandom: I know, right??


Two dudes today competing for worst motherfucker today at work:

- We have a system that connects your phone number to your savings card, so you can enter your phone number at the checkstand if you forget your card. So this dude at self-checkout is having a difficult time entering his number and I notice he is one number off. “You’re phone number is one number short” I mention as I point to the screen with my finger, not really touching the screen at all before leaning back. “You did something!” The dude accuses. “No, sir, I didn’t, your just a number short-” “NO you DID something!” He insists, going in and pressing the last number to successfully enter his number. “I’m sorry, sir, I was only trying to show you your phone number was-” “You DID something!” He snaps once again before literally breaking into laughter. I had no idea if he was laughing to indicate he had been joking or that I was close to tears at this point.

- Different dude literally says “I wish you could just shoot these things, it’s how I solve all my other problems.” about the self-checkout machines.

6564 4e5f


this game is from 2005 but this toad is in 2017

Reposted bydivi divi



who is going to play all the hollywood monster men everyone wants to fuck when doug jones finally returns to his people

he knows

6565 b543 500
Reposted bydivi divi
6568 9546



Reposted byhash hash

October 07 2017






lmao on the edinburgh zoo site it says “there is a daily penguin parade at 14:15 but it may be cancelled last minute as it is a voulntary parade, we do not coax the penguins with food, and they may not want to go out” lmao anarchopenguinism

this is the cutest goddamn thing i’ve ever heard

I saw the penguin parade. It was a very slow parade, because the pingüinos take their sweet time and aren’t very fast walkers to begin with.

can I volunteer to be a penguin

I feel like the world needs to know the context of the edinburgh zoo penguin parade, becausr I’ve been going there my entire life and I only found out about this the other year.

So a while back (I can’t remember exactly when but I think it was some time around the 40s/50s), a bunch of penguins escaped. A keeper left the gate open so a bunch of penguins just… followed them. And the people loved it. Look at these adorable birds outside their cage just following that guy around! So they get all the penguins back inside and realise that none of them really ran off, they just followed the keeper and went back inside and crowd thought it was amazing, so why not make it a regular thing? Get enough people there that if one of them goes to make a run for it (which at least one has in the past), they can’t get past the people, and let the ones who want outside have a little wander. So every day, they get a crowd, they open the gate, and whatever penguins want to get out can go, waddle about, squawk at people, and then hop back inside.

Also, one of those penguins is Brigadier Sir Nils Olaf III, Colonel-in-cheif of the Norwegian King’s Guard. This isn’t really related to the parade at all, I just love the fact that there’s a penguin in the Norwegian army

1894 70b5 500


where the fuck am I

October 06 2017

Older posts are this way If this message doesn't go away, click anywhere on the page to continue loading posts.
Could not load more posts
Maybe Soup is currently being updated? I'll try again automatically in a few seconds...
Just a second, loading more posts...
You've reached the end.

Don't be the product, buy the product!